41-year old, divorced mother of 3 (2 daughters, 1 son). Honorable Discharged U.S. ARNG—Military Police. Worked as a caseworker for former Congressman Hamilton Fish, Jr. (R-NY). Grew up in Maryland, lived in NY and VA. A.A. graduated ’92 from Dutchess Community College—Poughkeepsie, NY.
At the age of 13 I discovered Emily Dickinson and have dreamt of being a poet ever since. After the birth of my 1st daughter my seemingly perfect life spiraled into a wave of deep depression and memories of the sexual abuse I suppressed as a child and adolescent. I was diagnosed with delayed onset PTSD and after 4 years of psychiatric care, I began to self-medicate with prescription narcotics. This addiction led to my current sentence of 12 years for robbery of which I am in my 7th year.
I wrote “War” hoping to express the daily struggle between my brain and the memories that haunt me. The harmony (peace) between my heart and my head was taken—the control when I was raped by the “faceless man.” I try to take back control but it is a struggle—my mind will or will not be “the weapon of mass destruction”—my itchy finger the fight or flight mechanism. The power to live or self-destruct is mine.
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